A GENIUS IS A PERSON WHO CAN DO FOR $1, WHAT ANY FOOL CAN DO FOR $100 !!!
EXAMPLE:JUST AS WE COMPLETE SYLLABUS IN 1 DAY ,WHAT LECTURERS TRY IN 1 SEM !!!
Showing posts with label COLLEGE. Show all posts
Showing posts with label COLLEGE. Show all posts
Monday, February 9, 2009
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
WHO IS TRUE INDIAN???
ANS: RAJIV GANDHI
Bcoz, He said all indians are brothers and sisters n finally he married a foreign figure ...
Bcoz, He said all indians are brothers and sisters n finally he married a foreign figure ...
THE BEST QUOTE !!!
"EVERYONE HAS A BEST FRIEND DURING EACH STAGE OF LIFE-ONLY LUCKY ONES HAVE THE SAME FRIENDS IN ALL STAGES OF LIFE "
Friday, December 12, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
THINK DIFFERENTLY!!!
☻He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but
☻Don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine
☻Don't worry: I'm a bottle of wine
WHAT DOES A BOY SAYS TO GIRL TO GET SLAP???
You are 95% BEAUTIFUL.
You are 96% SWEET.
You are 97% nice.
You are 98% HANDSOME.
You are 99% LOVELY & 100% FOOL TO BELIEVE THIS.
You are 96% SWEET.
You are 97% nice.
You are 98% HANDSOME.
You are 99% LOVELY & 100% FOOL TO BELIEVE THIS.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
HEIGHT OF ESCAPISM!!!
PROF: WHERE IS U R ASSIGNMENT???
STUDENT:SIR,I LOST IT WHILE FIGHTING WITH STUDENTS WHO SAID DAT U WERE NOT THE BEST PROF IN THE COLLEGE !!!
STUDENT:SIR,I LOST IT WHILE FIGHTING WITH STUDENTS WHO SAID DAT U WERE NOT THE BEST PROF IN THE COLLEGE !!!
Saturday, September 20, 2008
WHO ALL FLIRTS,CHECK IT OUT ???
IS DUNIYA MEIN FLIRTS KI KAMI NAHI ...
SURAJ KO HI DEKLO!!!
SURAJ KO HI DEKLO!!!
- AATA HAI USHA KE SAATH
- JATA HAI SANDHYA KE SAATH
- SOTA HAI NISHA KE SAATH AUR UTHATA HAI ROSHNI KE SAATH...
DEFINE GIRL FREIND???
A PERSON WHO CHANGES EVERY HABIT IN A BOY AND AFTER A YEAR SAYS
"NOW U R NOT LIKE BEFORE,U HAVE CHANGES A LOT,I HATE U"
"NOW U R NOT LIKE BEFORE,U HAVE CHANGES A LOT,I HATE U"
WHAT IS A KISS???
IN VARIOUS POINT OF VIEW
- GEOMETRY:KISS IS THE SHORTEST DISTANCE BETWEEN TWO LIPS!!!
- ECONOMICS:KISS IS THE THING, FOR WHICH DEMAND IS ALWAYS HIGHER THAN SUPPLY!!!
- PHYSICS:KISS IS THE PROCESS OF CHARGING HUMAN BODY!!!
- COMPUTER:KISS IS JUST LIKE A LAN,IN WHICH TWO BODIES ARE CONNECTED WITHOUT ANY DATA CABLE!!!
- HISTORY:THE GREAT WAR BETWEEN TWO LIPS!!!
- CHEMISTRY:THE FAST REACTION BETWEEN TWO LIPS WITHOUT CATALYST!!!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
WHAT A CONVERSATION???
What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder?
"You may have graduated but I've got many degrees".
Friday, August 15, 2008
HIGH SCHOOL VS COLLEGE
25. In high school, you do homework. In college, you study.
24. No food is allowed in the hall in high school. In college, food must be provided at an event before students will come.
23. In high school, you wear your backpack on one shoulder; in college, on both.
22. In college, the professors can tell you the answer without looking at the teacher's guide.
21. In college, there are no bells or tardy slips.
20. In high school, you have to live with your parents. In college, you get to live with your friends.
19. In college, you don't have to wait in a certain lunch line to be cool.
18. Only nerds e-mailed in high school. (Cool kids hadn't heard of it.)
17. In high school, you're told what classes to take. In college, you get to choose; that is, as long as the classes don't conflict and you have the prerequisites and the classes aren't closed and you've paid your tuition.
16. In high school, if you screw up you can usually sweet-talk your way out of it. In college, you're lucky to ever talk with the professor.
15. In high school, fire drills are planned by the administration; in college, by the drunk frat boys on their way home when the bars close.
14. In college, any test consists of a larger percentage of your grade than your high school final exams ever did.
13. In high school, when the teacher said, "Good morning," you mumbled back. In college, when the professor says, "Good morning," you write it down.
12. In high school, freshman guys hit on senior girls. In college, senior guys hit on freshman girls.
11. In college, weekends start on Thursday.
10. In college, it's much more difficult to figure out the course schedule of the man/woman you have a crush on, in order to figure out where he/she will be walking around campus and at what time to find them there.
9. Once you've obtained the information described in #10, it's much more time-consuming to run between classes to that place where you know he/she will be in order to "just happen to bump into him/her."
8. In college, there's no one to tell you not to eat pizza three meals a day.
7. In college, your dad doesn't pay for dates.
6. In high school, it never took 3 or 4 weeks to get money from Mom and Dad.
5. College men are cuter than high school boys.
4. College women are legal.
3. In college, when you miss a class (or two or three), you don't need a note from your parents saying you were skip... uh, sick that day.
2. In high school, you can't go out to lunch because it's not allowed. In college, you can't go out to lunch because you can't afford it.
1. In college, you can blow off studying by writing lists like this.
24. No food is allowed in the hall in high school. In college, food must be provided at an event before students will come.
23. In high school, you wear your backpack on one shoulder; in college, on both.
22. In college, the professors can tell you the answer without looking at the teacher's guide.
21. In college, there are no bells or tardy slips.
20. In high school, you have to live with your parents. In college, you get to live with your friends.
19. In college, you don't have to wait in a certain lunch line to be cool.
18. Only nerds e-mailed in high school. (Cool kids hadn't heard of it.)
17. In high school, you're told what classes to take. In college, you get to choose; that is, as long as the classes don't conflict and you have the prerequisites and the classes aren't closed and you've paid your tuition.
16. In high school, if you screw up you can usually sweet-talk your way out of it. In college, you're lucky to ever talk with the professor.
15. In high school, fire drills are planned by the administration; in college, by the drunk frat boys on their way home when the bars close.
14. In college, any test consists of a larger percentage of your grade than your high school final exams ever did.
13. In high school, when the teacher said, "Good morning," you mumbled back. In college, when the professor says, "Good morning," you write it down.
12. In high school, freshman guys hit on senior girls. In college, senior guys hit on freshman girls.
11. In college, weekends start on Thursday.
10. In college, it's much more difficult to figure out the course schedule of the man/woman you have a crush on, in order to figure out where he/she will be walking around campus and at what time to find them there.
9. Once you've obtained the information described in #10, it's much more time-consuming to run between classes to that place where you know he/she will be in order to "just happen to bump into him/her."
8. In college, there's no one to tell you not to eat pizza three meals a day.
7. In college, your dad doesn't pay for dates.
6. In high school, it never took 3 or 4 weeks to get money from Mom and Dad.
5. College men are cuter than high school boys.
4. College women are legal.
3. In college, when you miss a class (or two or three), you don't need a note from your parents saying you were skip... uh, sick that day.
2. In high school, you can't go out to lunch because it's not allowed. In college, you can't go out to lunch because you can't afford it.
1. In college, you can blow off studying by writing lists like this.
ANY IDIOTS IN THE ROOM?
"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up" said the sarcastic lecturer.
After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the lecturer with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."
After a long silence, one freshman rose to his feet. "Now then mister, why do you consider yourself an idiot?" enquired the lecturer with a sneer.
"Well, actually I don't," said the student, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself."
Thursday, July 24, 2008
FUNNG QUOTE'S
80% of the final exam will be based on the one lecture you missed and the one book you didn't read
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges.
A college is a place where pebbles are polished and diamonds dimmed.
If you are given an open-book exam, you will forget your book.
Colleges are like old-age homes, except for the fact that more people die in colleges.
A college is a place where pebbles are polished and diamonds dimmed.
FUNNY QUOTE'S
To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say well done. And to the C students, I say you too may one day be president of the United States.
FINAL EXAM !!!
Four college friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to go up to Dallas and party with some friends up there. They had a great time. However, after all the partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Austin until early Monday morning.
Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the final and explain to him why they missed it.
They explained that they had gone to Dallas for the weekend with the plan to come back and study but, unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they missed the final.
The Professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up the final the following day. The guys were elated and relieved.
They studied that night and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, and told them to begin.
They looked at the first problem, worth 5 points. It was something simple about free radical formation. "Cool," they thought at the same time, each one in his separate room. "This is going to be easy."
Each finished the problem and then turned the page. On the second page was written:
(For 95 points): Which tire?Monday, July 7, 2008
ENGINEERS JOKES !!!!!!
WHAT IF SOFTWARE ENGINEERS START MAKING FILMS ??????
THERE NAMES WILL BE
1)MUNNA BHAI C++
2)HAMARA MOUSE AAPKE PAAS HAI
3)SOFTWARE MIL GAYA
4)PROGRAM KIYA THO DARNA KYA
THERE NAMES WILL BE
1)MUNNA BHAI C++
2)HAMARA MOUSE AAPKE PAAS HAI
3)SOFTWARE MIL GAYA
4)PROGRAM KIYA THO DARNA KYA
MOHABBAT JOKE!!!!
AAJ KA SAWAL
MOHABBAT HO JATI HAI YA KARNI PADTI HE???
VERY SIMPLE
LADHI SEXY HO TO HOJATI HAI ....
AUR AGAR AMEER HO THO KARNI PADTI HE ...
MOHABBAT HO JATI HAI YA KARNI PADTI HE???
VERY SIMPLE
LADHI SEXY HO TO HOJATI HAI ....
AUR AGAR AMEER HO THO KARNI PADTI HE ...
HOW A C.A(CHARTERED ACCOUNTANT)SCOLDS SOME ONE ????
WHEN HE IS ANGRY ??
U BLOODY BOUNCED CHEQUE,LIABILITY 2 HUMANITY,BORN BAD DEBT,DISHONOURED BILLINSOLVENT MAN.
I WILL BEAT U SO BADLY THAT YOUR BALANCE SHEET WILL NEVER TALLY!!!
U BLOODY BOUNCED CHEQUE,LIABILITY 2 HUMANITY,BORN BAD DEBT,DISHONOURED BILLINSOLVENT MAN.
I WILL BEAT U SO BADLY THAT YOUR BALANCE SHEET WILL NEVER TALLY!!!
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